it's beginning to dawn on me that humans are not supposed to be monogamists. what does that say for the state of marriage for the future? - i know not. and who invented marriage in the first place? it would seem like it's men since they were there to write all the scriptures and left women out of it. except for the fact that women are to be submissive in many of the organized religions, why did men write their own death trap? - i know not. one of my guy friends who's on the threshold to marriage says, "So someone would take care of us when we get old and have to wear diapers." he is having cold feet:

me: well...why are you confused?
he: feelings are confusing.
me: is it that you don't want to settle? is it that you think something better's gonna come along? you know that second reason is why new yorkers are all walking around single - because there's more ppl in the metropolis and so they think they have unlimited options.
he: i know some of it is fear of committing, not being single and free...
me: it's not all that. what's so good about free?

two bits of advice i've retained over the years which you can take or not:
1. marry someone who loves you more than you love him/her.
2. marry someone who you can't live without, not someone who you can live with.

he: But if everyone married someone who loved them more, no one could get married.

good point. frankly, i think number two is also difficult. there are plenty of people i thought i couldn't live without...at the time. but i think we are so self-sufficient these days, we can live without other individuals. and isn't it too much pressure on the other person if you can't live without them? i guess those two bits of advice just do not cut it these days...
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